Proverbs 31:28 Her children arise and call her blessed.
Today is Amma’s third anniversary. For the past few days, the above verse repeatedly came to my mind. Amma was no Proverbs 31 woman. For a long time, she was one person I did not want to end up like. In the world’s eyes, she was a failure, who lived a life of misery. But now, when I look back, I see her as a blessed woman because she finished her race with the words, “Naan Yesappava paaaka poren (I am going to see Jesus)”. Life can be a failure or it can even be a success in the world’s eyes but unless one finishes the race in Christ, it is a failure for sure.
But now when I look back, God has been so faithful towards her. All through her life, without wavering for one bit, Amma held on to God. Though her life did not seem to get any better, she held on to God. Though probably she did not realize it, I now understand very well that she truly was a blessed woman because I can see now that God has answered ALL her prayers. She always prayed that she would not suffer from sickness. Though she was diagnosed with cancer at its terminal stage, she suffered no pain from it. Amma would always quote the entire of Psalm 91 and Psalm 128 every time she prayed. And even through the times of the pandemic, God protected her from the virus. Though she was a very shy person, she had even gone to some neighbors and shared the gospel with them. I went through a bunch of her journals in which she had prayed for so many people whose situations I had shared with her. Every time she would ask me to spell their name and the place they live, and I read in her journals that she prayed for them. She did all these things with no bells and whistles.
In her last two weeks, as she was in the hospital, every time I went out in an autorickshaw, I always sang this song, “En Koodave Irum, O Yesuve (Be always with me, Jesus)”. As this was in 2021 in the middle of the pandemic, I would wear the mask so no one could see or hear me sing, but every time I sang just the chorus of the song because that’s all the lyrics I knew in this song. But on that day, a Wednesday, early morning, I saw this song being posted in one of the church groups which was sung by my friend’s family. That is when I heard the stanzas and my mind immediately registered the second stanza for some reason. I kept singing this song’s second stanza in Amma’s room that day. The second stanza talks about how God will be my father and mother in my tears and sorrows. That was the last time she heard me sing. How faithful God is to tell me of what was coming!
I believe another thing God honored was her desire for me to learn to play the piano. I am just glad that I could play these chords and sing this song. God redeemed us and restored our relationships!
So many people helped my parents with everything and I pray for God’s blessings over each one of them! May God richly reward then for their kindness!
