20$ bill

In 2017, I said a small prayer asking God to give me the talent and teach me as I wanted to try watercolor arts to write Bible verses on them. I had not tried watercolor before, but in my mind, I thought watercolor would be more forgiving, as I can wash away the flaws with water. God started to bless these arts, right from the beginning, though I am not trained in art.

From then on, I had been doing so many arts, in various forms – wall art, greeting cards, bookmarks – all with Bible verses. I had given so many bookmarks to friends in church, prayer groups etc. I delighted in giving it to others because I was giving them the Word of God.

2021 has been a rough year for me and lot of my prayers were my tears. As life got rough, I wanted to focus more on God’s work. One day I went to church a little early so that I could pray. I cried my eyes out to the Lord. As I opened my eyes, a lady came up the stairs and she saw me and my tears. She came towards me, sat beside me and asked me what happened. Then she prayed for me. This was such an unexpected happening and I felt so overwhelmed that God sent someone to let me know that He saw my tears.

The following week, I saw her at Tuesday prayer and she remembered me. I told her that it was God who sent her to pray for me. That Sunday she came over and gave me a greeting card with a very thoughtful note saying that she is praying for me. I felt incredibly touched.

I was going to do an offering song in Indian church that Sunday, though to me, offering song means stepping out of the boat in faith. The song I was going to sing was ‘How deep the Father’s love for us!’. I do not prefer to do an offering song without saying a few words about it.I didn’t know what to say about the song as the Father’s love and Christ’s crucifixion is so profound as it is. God gave me a great insight on that Saturday about the greatest lesson that Christ taught us from the Cross is forgiveness and that I should also forgive and get rid of all bitterness from my heart.

I learnt that forgiveness is a constant process and not a one time thing that we do. We need to constantly analyze our heart to check if there is any unforgiveness is found. And as David prayed, we ought to ask everyday to give us a clean heart and renew the right spirit within us. Joseph being human like us and a great role model for forgiveness, did not go through this test for the first seventeen years of his life. But the next 13 years tested him in the area of forgiveness. Psalm 105:17-20 He(The LORD) sent a man before them-Joseph-who was sold as a slave. 18. They hurt his feet with fetters, he was laid in irons. 19. Until the time that his word came to pass, the word of the LORD tested him. 20. The king sent and released him, the ruler of the people let him go free. 

For the past couple months, I had a deep desire to use this art skill to support mission works as led by the LORD. But no matter how hard I tried to sell these artworks, I could not sell any of these and I could clearly see that the LORD had closed that door. As days went by, I felt disappointed that God is not opening a door for a Kingdom purpose that I was asking Him. That is when God taught me to get rid of the unforgiveness and bitterness. On the same day of my offering song, I repented of my unforgiveness. That Sunday, I took 2 bookmarks for her. I have no words to express her reaction and the first thing she asked was “Can I hire you to make these for me?”. Though I didn’t know what it meant, I said yes.

By God’s grace, I made 2 bookmarks again and gave them to her on Tuesday. I have given so many bookmarks to people simply as a way of giving God’s Word to them. She took me by surprise when she handed me a $20 bill. I refused right away saying I cannot take it. But she said, “Take it and use it for what you wanted to do.” I had mentioned to her that I wanted to support missions with this skill. She also added saying someone gave it to her and asked her to give it away and so she gave it to me. Because of those words, and also because I suddenly felt reminded about my prayer, I received that $20 with joy, knowing that God has finally opened the door for me. And this happened right after He taught me about forgiveness and my repentance. The lesson I learnt is that even if we pray a Kingdom purpose prayer, God can answer it only if we pray with a clean heart free of any unwanted heavy things. I have never before felt this happy to see a $20 bill in my life.

I strongly believe that God has opened the door for a greater purpose in my life. I am looking forward to be able to support so many mission works as led by the LORD.

Psalm 37:4 Delight yourself also in the LORD and He shall give you the desires of your heart.